CouncilMotors Posted November 7, 2004 Report Share Posted November 7, 2004 Hmm, for a TV Series about cars; Vicki Greasy Henderson talking crap with a slight lisp. Tiffany Dell with a voice like a mid-pubescent boy, powersliding something (yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwn) Quentin "Clocker" Willlllllson" waxing lyrical about what ever heap of poo he's got about 8 of on his forecourt. Poacher Turned Gamekeeper? Smashing cars into each other/barriers for cheap sensationalism. This is the Daily Express of Car Programmes. Jezza must laugh his tits off when he watches this sorry pack of TV losers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SlickDizzy Posted November 7, 2004 Report Share Posted November 7, 2004 At least we can get it here in America. We don't get Top Gear as far as I know (unless they show it on the BBC USA channel). I have to illegally download all of my Top Gear episodes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thorburn Posted November 7, 2004 Report Share Posted November 7, 2004 [ QUOTE ] Tiffany Dell with a voice like a mid-pubescent boy, powersliding something (yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwn) Smashing cars into each other/barriers for cheap sensationalism. [/ QUOTE ] Two things, 1) At least Tiff Needle CAN powerslide cars, as opposed to Mr Clarksons half arsed attempts (and hes a top bloke having met him a few years back), infact has Top Gear even driven a car on the road since the start of Fifth Gear? They just piss about on they're track.... 2) Because Top Gear NEVER EVER goes for cheap sensationalism, except for the jumping the caravans in a Volvo, or the bikes in a bus, or destroying that Toyota, or 90% of EVERY SHOW! At least Fifth Gear actually reviews cars and gives an opinion, as opposed to Top Gear who seem to select a winner on which is the best at the oh-so-common daily chore of driving on wet sand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Killmode9 Posted November 7, 2004 Report Share Posted November 7, 2004 Ooh, just little harsh on the presenters there, but I know where you're coming from. Any show which hopes that the viewers will fight with their aerials and strain to see through the fuzz just because they keep promising to drive a car into a wall every five seconds is going to be pretty rubbish. Ah, and don't forget the adverts. Give me JC racing a train through France, smashing up a caravan and moaning about Johnny-foreigner any day of the week. “The dashboard looks like I made it” –classic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xspencex Posted November 7, 2004 Report Share Posted November 7, 2004 IMO neither of them are that good really....With car culture like we have in this country whay do we put up with Top Gear and 5th Gear..oh and some drivel on Morons and Motors. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snail Posted November 8, 2004 Report Share Posted November 8, 2004 I was watching 5th gear last night......gotta say the missus wouldn't have sat through half an hour of it, because it is just plain geeky. That why i think top gear has done a pretty good job, its not the best, but because of the amusing stuff, and the other less geeky bits, the missus will sit through an hour of it, without forcing me to watch corrie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ari Posted November 8, 2004 Report Share Posted November 8, 2004 Not a huge fan of Fifth Gear, how-ever I think the car crashing features are extremely good for one very important reason. The only experience Max Saxo has of a car crash as he races through town at 60mph to impress his chavette is the ones he experiences on Gran Turusmo, where his 1,000hp Skyline bounces happily off the barrier at 2000 mph undamaged and he races on. If Fifth Gear crash demos give kids (or reps or school mums or indeed anyone)a little insight into the real horror of stuffing their pride and joy at 40mph let alone higher speeds then just maybe one or two of them might turn the stereo down a notch, put down that mobile phone/make up/sandwich/girlfriends leg and actually concentrate a little on making sure that it doesn't happen to them. And this can only be a good thing. Top Gear (which I love incidently) does fail pretty dramatically to ever put any kind of safety message across and whilst safety might not be sexy, it is actually quite important. And the only way anyone is ever going to get the message is to witness the kind of carnage that results from a high speed shunt, so top marks Fifth Gear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bazza_g Posted November 8, 2004 Report Share Posted November 8, 2004 [ QUOTE ] Vicki Greasy Henderson talking crap with a slight lisp. [/ QUOTE ] but still looking luuuurvley ! You wouldn't say no, would you ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CouncilMotors Posted November 8, 2004 Author Report Share Posted November 8, 2004 No, I wouldn't thay no becauth I'm dethperate :-) Both programmes are pretty crap really and you're right, JC couldn't drive a nail into a piece of wood. What IS that driving on wet sand all about? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bazza_g Posted November 8, 2004 Report Share Posted November 8, 2004 Perhaps that Hamster guy has a bit of a wet sand fetish ? makes me uncomfortable just thinking about it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BURTON Posted November 8, 2004 Report Share Posted November 8, 2004 I like both really... Very interesting.. Like how they do things differently..its all about ratings... I like Motors TV!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thorburn Posted November 8, 2004 Report Share Posted November 8, 2004 Think I've worked it out, on wet sand they can do long exagerated slides and therefore don't have to pay someone with talent to do them, therefore being able to pay Clarkson even more! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snail Posted November 8, 2004 Report Share Posted November 8, 2004 [ QUOTE ] Think I've worked it out, on wet sand they can do long exagerated slides and therefore don't have to pay someone with talent to do them, therefore being able to pay Clarkson even more! [/ QUOTE ] Either that, or they've already blown their yealy tyre budget Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beobloke Posted November 9, 2004 Report Share Posted November 9, 2004 They should rename it "How you might die in a car this week" as that's all they seem to prattle on about......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ari Posted November 9, 2004 Report Share Posted November 9, 2004 But if they stop one person from dying in a car this week as a result of that person actually becoming aware of the risks then maybe it'll have been worth it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mollox Posted November 9, 2004 Report Share Posted November 9, 2004 [ QUOTE ] But if they stop one person from dying in a car this week as a result of that person actually becoming aware of the risks then maybe it'll have been worth it. [/ QUOTE ] even if they were driving a nova?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pagan Posted November 10, 2004 Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 If some chavs decide that they want to drive fast, crash and die slowly in a burning wreck, then that's fine by me, as long as they don't kill actual people whilst they do it. Shows that decide that they have to give a safety message every five seconds must have an extremely stupid audience. For example, I am clever enough to understand that if I drive my car at top speed into a wall, I am likely to get injured in some way, whether it be my insurance or my physique. Top gear gives few safety messages, and as a result is far more watchable. However, on 5th Gear (a rather poo reworking of the Top Gear title) you just get given endless trailers of what is going to happen in the next five minutes, and these trailers are so badly written that they explain the next item anyway, so when it does arrive you know what is going to happen. My, what a rant! I shall have to go and calm down... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ari Posted November 10, 2004 Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 [ QUOTE ] If some chavs decide that they want to drive fast, crash and die slowly in a burning wreck, then that's fine by me, as long as they don't kill actual people whilst they do it. [/ QUOTE ] Right, so you think the answer is to build special seperate roads for people below a certain IQ? It's an idea I suppose... [ QUOTE ] Shows that decide that they have to give a safety message every five seconds must have an extremely stupid audience. For example, I am clever enough to understand that if I drive my car at top speed into a wall, I am likely to get injured in some way, whether it be my insurance or my physique. [/ QUOTE ] Unfortunately you've only got to drive for 10 minutes to realise that a frightening number of drivers do fall into the former catagory. Lke you I am well aware of the consiquences of an accident, however it is extremely clear that a great number of people sadly are not. And the "Playstation generation" who've spent the last 15 years drving a pixelated Skyline into walls with zero damage and watching people climb out of three figure crashes with barely a scratch in "Fast and Furious" have less idea then most. [ QUOTE ] Top gear gives few safety messages, and as a result is far more watchable. However, on 5th Gear (a rather poo reworking of the Top Gear title) you just get given endless trailers of what is going to happen in the next five minutes, and these trailers are so badly written that they explain the next item anyway, so when it does arrive you know what is going to happen. [/ QUOTE ] Totally agree that Top Gear is the superior program. But safety message?? Give me a break! [ QUOTE ] My, what a rant! I shall have to go and calm down... [/ QUOTE ] We'll send someone to sit with you... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dozymare Posted November 10, 2004 Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 Couldn't abide Vicki Butler chuffing Henderson on the old Top Gear so don't watch 5th Gear on a point of principle. She can't drive for toffee and only appears to be included to whitter on about cars being cute in some bizarre misguided opinion that that's all girls are interested in cars for. At least JC & co don't patronise me all the bloody time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
s4dreamer Posted November 10, 2004 Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 [ QUOTE ] If some chavs decide that they want to drive fast, crash and die slowly in a burning wreck, then that's fine by me, as long as they don't kill actual people whilst they do it. [/ QUOTE ] I agree, but then again, I don't. Sure, it would be much better for the gene pool if they all went out and killed themselves - as would allowing football hooligans to fight it out to the death in an arena away from all the normal footbal fans. However, the problem is that our overworked police, ambulance folks, hospitals and firefighters would be left to pick up the pieces, so there'd have to be some arrangement whereby accidents involving only a chav car would not be attended by the emergency services until they had some free time on their hands. Oh, and Ari, do you really think that safety messages in a car programme make it past the ears of the majority of young/chav drivers ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ari Posted November 10, 2004 Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 [ QUOTE ] Oh, and Ari, do you really think that safety messages in a car programme make it past the ears of the majority of young/chav drivers ? [/ QUOTE ] Subconciously, yes. I don't think anyone could look at the twisted mutilated wreckage that results from a high speed prang without it sinking in just a little on some level. The one they did where they drove a car at 70mph into the back of a stationary queue of traffic (as though there were a motorway hold up and someone piled straight into it, does happen) made me feel physically sick. I don't think anyone who saw that would be left in any doubt as to the potnetial consiquences of getting it wrong at high speed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaddyDub Posted November 10, 2004 Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 JC is a genius, 5th Gear has no chance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thorburn Posted November 10, 2004 Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 Clarkson is no way a genius, hes a showman and not a lot more Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaddyDub Posted November 10, 2004 Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 IMO he's a comady genius, this is the type of thing I find funny, THAT is why he is a genius. Says something for what I find amusing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pagan Posted November 11, 2004 Report Share Posted November 11, 2004 A seperate road network for the chavs? Not what I was thinking of. I was of the idea that they should be sold specially modified cars, so that when they pressed the accelerator thaen a whirring chainsaw would pivot down through their empty heads. Like that show "Beadle's About" but without some tit in a beard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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