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FROM M3 CAB TO MONARO VXR


MOSE
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Yep, the M3 has now gone (thank feck) and I wish I could say that I am missing the car, but the truth is I’m not, cos I’ve now got something much, much more entertaining. I should have collected this car well over a week ago, well 24th September to be precise, but some knobead in a Lexus decided to get intimate and plough into my rear end, so until the repair was done to the M3, needless to say I couldn’t drive away in the new car. For those who currently own an M3, be conscious of whose behind you, the repair bill totalled a whopping £2931, just for a replacement rear bumper, the parking sensors, paint and labour. Phew!

Anyways, most on here know of the trials I had with the M3, and it made owning the car very difficult, particularly as I didn’t have the best relationship with the dealer, but the final straw came when for the second time the car was badly scratched on the front left wing after it had been in for some electrical work (AGAIN). I collected the car, got it home, and was straight on the phone complaining about the scratch. The dealer had no interest and said they would not be held responsible. I thought fine…..and the following day I was on the phone chasing contacts from various other dealers I had been in contact with regarding a p/ex for another car.

Choosing another car over the M3 wasn’t an easy task. I had already test driven the Noble GTO-3, 3R and M400…..I had test driven the Segaris a few times and I had shown a serious interest with Ted Marlow (Director at Ultima Sports) of buying an Ultima GTR. So, my choice of car to replace the M3 was narrowed down to three cars. The Noble M12 3R, the TVR Segaris and the Ultima GTR But the choice had to be one of practicality other than the need to just HAVE the car. Whatever I replaced the M3 with, the wife would have to be able to drive it as well. But as she is a short-arse, at only something like 4’ 11”, the Segaris was immediately ruled out frown.gif. Even with TVR’s bespoke cushion, she could not see over the top of the dash, neither could she get comfortable with the pedals, so the TVR was out. Next up was the Noble, and I came so very, very close to buying a gorgeous M12 3R, but c’est la vie. I wont bore you with the details, am not convinced that Noble dealers like p/exing M3s. The Ultima was the car I really wanted, for that all out big and ballsy Chevy V8 powered 640hp beast of an engine. I have always loved the sound of a raw V8 and the power it can deliver and promised myself one day that I would have one. Sadly, to have a car built from new, by the guys at Ultima, would take a full 12 months and cost a small fortune. To have the car built for me was not affordable, and I have no patience or expertise to go building my own car. So, all three options were out and I was stuck with a pain in the arse M3. So was time to start looking again.

Enter the Vauxhall Monaro VXR.

OK, I had seen the Top Gear and Fifth Gear reports; I had seen the guys from Japan doing all the fancy power sliding stuff. I had seen Jeremy Clarkson falling in love with a Vauxhall, listened to Clarkson blame the Monaro for his broken back, seen the Stig take it round the track, watched Tiff give it welly but I had never really shown any interest in the car as it was a Vauxhall. Then one night, after at least half a bottle of Hennessy, I was watching the Top Gear shows again and the Monaro started to become and interesting choice. So, following day it was off to the local Vaux dealer, and there in the middle of the showroom was a Monaro VXR in Phantom Black. So immediately I asked them if they were interested in a deal with the M3, they agreed and I was in the demo car quicker than they could pass me the keys.

The Demo car was a 2004 (54) Monaro 5.7 in flame red, completely unmodified. Within half hour of driving the car I was sold. After looking at the M3, reading of all the problems and history over the last 10 months, Vaux offered me a great figure for the M3, I snapped it and we did the deal. It was quick, it was painless and it was definitely the right thing to do.

So, after living with the Monaro for two days, what’s it like? In short, it’s pretty much left me speechless. I somehow feel I could kick myself for not having bought one of these things before I got the M3, but am glad I got it when I did as the numbers of new cars in the UK are now extremely limited, certainly less than 20 and apparently no more will be arriving. Somehow I don’t think I will be looking back.

To many people’s eyes, the look of the Monaro is dated and its bland, but I find it quite intriguing. From various angles, there are hints of several different car designs here. A quick look down the rear quarter and the car resembles the rear of an XK8, there’s a very subtle hint of The DB7 in there as well. The paint work is immaculate, not a hint of a scratch, a swirl or a blemish of any description at all. More that can be said for when the M3 was delivered. Opening the driver’s door and sitting in the driver’s seat, it feels fantastic; the seats actually feel like they are hugging you to death. The leather is soft and it is amazingly comfortable. And the smell of that leather is superb. Its quality stuff. Like the M3, the Monaro has electronic memory seats and can be moved in 8 different ways. Fortunately these seats are a hell of a lot quicker to adjust than the M3. I am now down to one fag while I wait for the seat to tilt, than the usual 3 I had while waiting for the M3 to do the same. Visibility is absolutely spot on, there isn’t a single blind spot on the car, well none that I can find as yet. There is ample space in the back for two adults as well, and bags of leg and head space. Unless you are over 6’ 6” maybe.

A lot has been written about GMs interior finishes being inferior and boring, but the Monaro falls just short of those claims. While the quality of the materials used on the dash are in no way in the same league as those I was used to on the M3, it is not as bad as some reviews make out. There is a leather steering wheel, handbrake and gear stick, all in the same leather used on the seats. There is leather and alcantara on the door cards, alcantara on the headlining. What appears to look like a really cheap and nasty brushed aluminium dash trim, is actually better than I imagined it to be and that horrible green dash illumination is actually beginning to grow on me (AND I HATE GREEN). The green illumination has a really eerie ambience at night. The whole control panel is well lit, even when totally dimmed. It genuinely looks kinda spooky. There are even heavy duty aluminium foot pedals as well. Oooooh and the Speedo goes up to 200(mph) as well, cant wait to find out if it will get there though. If I could find fault or criticise anything on the interior of the Monaro, it could only be the way that the pedals are offset to the right and it takes a little bit of getting used to.

Opening the boot and….well……it’s a bit disappointing. Its well laid out, it has a good quality carpet, but half the boot has been chopped off to allow the new design of replacing the petrol tank above the rear axle. Nevermind, I’m a one bag kinda guy when I go away! Space saver is in an unusual Phoenix Yellow colour, so M3 coming back to haunt me already, the toolkit is the bollox, there’s a first aid kit there somewhere but cant yet find it, oh and tucked away in the corner of the boot is a courtesy bag of goodies from Vaux. So in here is a load of car shampoo, alloy cleaner, wax and polishing kit, a load of quality terry towels, applicators and what seems to be a quality Chamois.

So, lets start the bugga up. Clutch down, turn the key and VROOOOOM. Oh yes…….love that tone and my god am I smiling….and if I’m not mistaken there’s a bit of curtain twitching going on already. That 6 litre Chevy beastie is now gurgling, coughing, popping and ready for some action. Now before I set off, just need to tell you this. On Wednesday of last week, I was invited over to the Wortec site at Rainham, to look at a Monaro that had been given the treatment. The car I took out had been given the upgraded Wortec exhaust, the upgraded suspension system, the AP brake upgrade and the Rip Shift short change gear mod. Engine had been remapped once exhaust was fitted. From a car that has 405bhp, a few simple tweaks and it is pushing 475. The simple mods completely transform the car and I am grateful to Brian at Wortec for letting me drive the car and helping me decide where my money is going to be spent…..in the NOT too distant future wink.gif I think MrMe will clarify how excited I was when I got home that afternoon and immediately PMd him with the excitement of the experience.

Anyways, back to my stock Monaro for now. OK, windows down, out of the driveway, out of the street and onto the road taking me through the High Street. Car poodling along in 4th at about 1200rpm, gently popping and spitting. A quick blip of the gears into third and…….oooh that’s turned a few heads, even a granny wearing a hair net! Ok sat at the lights, up alongside me are two lads in a Seat Leon Cupra. Few gentle revs…..oooh more popping and coughing and I am loving this. Guy in the Cupra lowers his window and says he loves the sound and says “car’s the bollox mate”. Lights change and he floors it and I just carry on at a gentle pace, gurgling my way through the town centre and towards the A331 to take me off to a few roads where I can drive this baby without any grief. Now, as much as this car sounds nice and as much as the stock exhaust allows the huge V8 to do its best Le Petomane impressions I am disappointed with the stock system.

I mentioned earlier that I drove Brian’s car (from Wortec) and in a way I have been a bit spoilt. The stock system on the Monaro does the car no justice whatsoever. Its far from shite, but I have to admit at this stage that the 5.7l Monaro that I had on demo sounded better with a single twin exhaust. Maybe after only 35 miles, the engine and the exhaust haven’t bedded in yet….doesnt really bother me, neither does it hinder the thrill of driving the car, but I cannot help but remember what it felt and sounded like driving Brians car……the difference between maybe the sound of the M3 and a balls out Daytona V8 Racer…..and I’m not kidding.

So….back to my stock system again, and I am approaching the roundabout to take me onto the A331. So, round the roundabout and off to the south for a bit of a drive. Ah, feck it, lets go up the A331 first, get some petrol wink.gif So, round again and off down the slip road to take me onto the northbound A331. Great….not busy at all, apart from this sodding lorry in front of me doing 30ish. OK, clear road, indicate right…..woops wipers go on (keep forgetting that the indicators on the Monaro are on the right)….foot down and WAHEY!!!! But gently does it. Like the M3, when the engine is cold, you need to wait for the oil temperature gauge to give you the all clear before any reasonable temptation of right foot fun. It’s a 6 mile journey to the nearest Optimax Centre so just going to take it easy. Not a great deal of traffic on this road today, but in just a few short miles, a healthy pedigree of motors have gone by, some slowing down for a gander, one Noble GTO-3 (guy got level and floored it, still gotta love that Darth Vader twin-turbo aspiration) a Bentley GT and a Carerra 4S.

OK, this should be interesting its petrol time. Optimax is at 95.2p not bad since this bugga has a 70ltr tank and I intend to try and use it today. So, standing here filling up the car and this young chavvy guy comes over and says “So, what is it ?”. I said “It’s a Monaro”, he looked a bit puzzled as he was looking about the car and said “Well it doesn’t really look like a Ferrari”. So I replied “It’s a MONARO not a MARANELLO”, guy said “mint” and walked off to his Corsa. Evidently if I had pulled a Magnum out of my pocket, this guy would have thought it was an ice-lolly.

OK so got a full tank of Petrol, engine is warm, oil is nice and warm so lets poodle off. The amazing thing about driving the Monaro about is that it really doesn’t give a shyte about what gear it is in. It would be happy poodling along at 10mph in 6th. I’m driving at 50mph in 3rd and it really couldn’t care less. Generally, the car is a big lazy lump. Its great, but hit the accelerator and all hell is unleashed. OK at the lights again now and I got a clear road. Green……into 1st, then straight into 2nd bit of welly and my god I’m loving this, 65 in 2nd gear and it isn’t even hinting at wanting a gear change. The torque is unbelievable for the size and weight of the car. The Segaris was quick and it had oodles of torque, but sorry, the thrill I’ve got at the moment of driving the Monaro far surpasses what I experienced when driving the Segaris. Sadly not quiet as much as the thrill of the M400 given the huge weight difference. The car is happy at 70 in 3rd and into 4th gives the spine a quick rumble of those really low V8 vibes. The road is so unbelievably quiet today so am going to turn around and drive this road again.

Second time down the A331 and I’m wanting to know what the car is like in 6th gear. At just under 80 in 5th I put it into 6th and the car is just purring away at about 1800rpm, to be honest I find it quiet funny. There’s hardly any engine or wind noise and the car feels so smooth on the road, and the A331 isn’t the best of roads. Down into 5th again and a bit of right foot and the car is just wanting to go and go, you can feel it begging you to give it some stick. So slowing down a bit now and down into 4th, letting a bit of traffic by. There is quite a nasty angled bend approaching and was always a good test for the rear end of the M3. The car would loose the back end slowly at about 65 going into this corner. So approaching the corner at 50 in 4th gear, I’ve floored it and the car is just gripping the road so well….HUGE SMILE HERE!!! FECK ME. Man that got the ticker racing a bit. Only thing I noticed about hitting the same corner at high speed was that instead of the car tailing slightly to the right, it felt like it was rolling slightly, but again the grip and control on that stretch of road was unreal. I wanna do it again.

OK, so enough of that and time to do a few circuits of the Hog’s Back, probably the worst road in the area. The Hog’s Back is the road from the bottom of the A331 to Guildford and its road surface is bloody terrible. The M3 seriously struggled with the camber of this road and it was a good test for the M3s suspension and tracking. Given that my M3 was a cab, there was an amazing amount of scuttle shake and vibration and there was also a lot of tyre noise as well. So will be very interesting to see what the Monaro is like on the same stretch of road. So far, its good. There are plenty of potholes and many areas where the M3 did not track very well at all. The Monaro is just ploughing along this road without any problem, I’m actually trying to find fault but I cant. There is no vibration in the dash or in the steering wheel….there is no tyre noise and the car feels so at ease with this very difficult stretch of road. OK time to turn around and do it again, but this time a bit more spirited.

Second time around and now driving the car harder there is little if no difference whatsoever. There is a bit of play in the steering but this is just an effortless drive. I am most impressed; in the M3 I would be trying my best to keep the car on the road. Now I want to know what the car is like round the twisties. So am off into Headly Down and Liphook area and around the Devil’s Punch Bowl. Lots of nice lanes around there. With the windows down and driving along a road that is clearly not big enough for anything that comes the other way, the exhaust note actually sounds a bit different, I can now hear a lot more detail and its making me smile again. Oh and there is plenty of shite on this road as well, so will need to clean the car tomorrow and god help anyone walking past cos they’ll get covered in it.

These roads are typical country lanes that have not been surfaced properly and have some unpredictable bends and tight turns, HEAVEN!!! I’ve read some really bad reports of the stock brake system and it seems to get hot too quickly. Well, what brakes system doesn’t. So, in second gear down this lane nothing coming….I hope….hitting 45 corner bend approaching, slow on the brakes and…….easy. Next corner bend approaching bit quicker, light on the brakes and……no problem at all. Slight roll but nothing to worry about. God I am loving this car to bits.. Bit further on and right hand bend approaching, bit of brake and woops, lost it slightly on some gravel but car easily corrected itself. A few more tight bends but the car really didn’t seem to struggle with it apart from tailing a bit on some loose gravel.

OK, want to do some roundabouts next, which were always my favourite when driving the M3. So back to the A331 for a series of roundabouts. There’s one particular roundabout that made the M3 a hell of a lot of fun to drive. The angle fo the road dips quite sharply to the right and then immediately left as you turn this very tight bend and then with a bit of right foot the car slides sideways, holds itself there for a few seconds and with some minor adjustment of steering the car is once again in a straight line. So, how does the Monaro compare? Cant wait to find out. I usually approach this particular roundabout at about 35 in the M3, so going to do exactly the same now. OK, clear road again, indicate right…..and the bloody wipers go on again….definitely going to take some getting used to, and the car just gently purrs around this at 35, so foot down and a sight hint of rear end tailing, but the car wont really budge. Hhhmmmm, am determined to get this thing sliding a bit. So round to do it again. Second attempt and this time still at 35 in 2nd but am going to give it a bit more welly going around……and there it is. With a bit more power the car slips sideways and that engine sounds like it is begging for a bit of a banter, so more power and no problem, the back of the car went sideways and corrected itself immediately with a slight turn of the wheel. I can tell I am going to have fun with this.

So now I want to see what the car is like at cruising over a distance, so am going to take it down the A3 to Havant and back again. I want to try and see wat kind of mpg this thing will do after reading that the typical combined figures are about 18.5mpg. So far, with all the driving about town, playing the car through various gears and messing about in the lanes, the car is showing 16.3mpg, not bad considering the figures for urban driving are stated as 12.4mpg. So am interested to see what kind of effect a simple 60m journey down an A road would have on the petrol consumption.

There is cruise control on this car, but cant be arsed to figure out how it works at this stage, so am poodling along again between 70/80 in 5th. 20 miles into the journey and not that far from Havant, the car is showing 19.4mpg and that is not bad considering the size of the engine. A quick gurgle through Havant and back onto the Northbound A3 and another 20 miles north and the car is now showing 20.8. Suddenly there’s this bloody alarm thing ringing and I cant figure out if it is my phone or the car. I cant recall hearing that tone before now, but as I look at the dash there is this message up there on the display telling me “Its time to take a break”, yeah sure ok, is this something to do with Aussie humour again? Will it offer me a XXXX if I manage to get it to the limit? Nice touch but time to turn all that crap off.

At the end of this particular road, the car is showing 22.3mpg and I am hugely impressed. Over 10 months with the M3 and given the way I liked to drive the car, the best I had was 24.3mpg, but often as bad as 19.2, but this is impressive and I think it will get better. At this stage of the journey and having driven almost 145 miles, with a full tank of petrol, the petrol gauge is showing above half way, so am happy with that.

I love driving this car, I simply love every aspect of it. It is hard reaching a very clear section of road and resisting the temptation to floor it. So for the remainder of today’s drive I wanted to do a few quick circuits of this particular road. This particular section of road is just off the A3, between two roundabouts and about 3 miles between the two. I’m not really that interested in finding out how fast this car can go, I really just want to get a sense of how the car feels on a nice smooth road with varying speed. Between second and third and accelerating hard, I am thrust back in the seat and the car genuinely feels like it is trying to dig up the road. The car feels like it has lowered itself on the suspension as I am accelerating. My God that was quick and the car is just begging for another round. So back we go and after about 5 attempts at this section of road, this car is proving it is one hell of a quick motor for its size. It feels a hell of a lot quicker than the M3 and it has masses more torque as well.

Right had enough fun for one day so off home. Gonna take a route with a lot of roundabouts and have some more fun. One particular roundabout is a big bugga and I loved going around this and feeling the car gently tailing but holding it perfectly until I straightened up. Phew…..that was fun and I was gently reminded that my old sphincter muscle was still there.

So there ya have it, Mose has gone nuts and bought a “V” word. Well, don’t be fooled by the badge, this is definitely one very serious piece of kit. There is nothing on this car that relies on massive technology like the M3 did and thank feck for that. Those days for me are over. This is back to basics and back to simple automotive engineering, but my god I love it. Servicing looks very reasonable as well compared to the M3. Car to be done once every 10000m or 12 months for £150…..ermmmm yes £150. Tyres 245/35/19 all round come in at around £159 each compared to the PS2s on the M3, so am chuffed to bits with that.

So, going to try and get about 1500 miles on this baby as quickly as possible and get that engine run I so I can get the mods I want as a priority. Have also got to find a bloody good hiding place for the spare key cos the wife has driven it and she LOVES IT!!

Some Pics are up in the Gallery. Enjoy!

MOSE : MONARO VXR

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grin.gif Review and a half fella - glad its finally arrived ! jump.gif

grin.gif Black, def the best colour for it 169144-ok.gif I remember blipping the throttle of one at the Vauxhall dealer when I had the VXT - it vibrated the huge glass windows of the showroom ! With an aftermarket exhaust on it, its going to sounds awesome 169144-ok.gif

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It had to be black to be honest. Red doesnt really suit it and I think the Astra VXR looks so tacky in red. I dont do silver either. So, either it was black or I imported one from Oz, but at a stupid price. I can live with black and I love it to pieces.

Thanx for the good vibes, I know it aint everyone's cup of tea, but it certainly is mine!! 169144-ok.gif

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[ QUOTE ]

I think MrMe will clarify how excited I was when I got home that afternoon and immediately PMd him with the excitement of the experience.

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I can confirm Mose was so excited that once I had translated his enthusiastic prose into standard English it became obvious that I still wouldn't be able to understand a word of it.... yelrotflmao.gif169144-ok.gif

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I mentioned earlier that I drove Brian’s car (from Wortec) and in a way I have been a bit spoilt. The stock system on the Monaro does the car no justice whatsoever. Its far from shite, but I have to admit at this stage that the 5.7l Monaro that I had on demo sounded better with a single twin exhaust. Maybe after only 35 miles, the engine and the exhaust haven’t bedded in yet….doesnt really bother me, neither does it hinder the thrill of driving the car, but I cannot help but remember what it felt and sounded like driving Brians car……the difference between maybe the sound of the M3 and a balls out Daytona V8 Racer…..and I’m not kidding.

[/ QUOTE ]

Was just reading Evo at dinnertime, and their review of their Monaro VXR. And guess what? They've just fitted a sports exhaust! grin.gif

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[ QUOTE ]

Watch out for the feds on the hogs back, they have been there loads lately but I am sure you have seen them anyway.

Top review and the car looks awesome. 169144-ok.gif169144-ok.gif

Which shell garage was that?

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Just had a domestic with the Missus who said that it was a sainsbury's garage and not shell and I said No....it was a bloody Shell Optimax place.......but woops sorry she was right! But the Optimax place I normally go to when I am passing is on the Fleet Road, roughly 6 miles from here. I need to lay off the brandy for a few weeks I think. And I stand corrected that the price of the petrol I put in my car was 98.7 and not 95.2 (95 Ron). I'll probably feck it all up and put diesel in it tomorrow.

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Mose.....this is the perfect opportunity for you to get the beast brought to the Northeast Meet next Sunday.

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Hhhhmmmm, ya never know. But if I dont make this one, will definately make one at some stage. To be honest I think I would want to wait until I got the upgrade done, will definately be sounding its best then

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I vowed to myself after seeing these beasts in Oz that I'd have one, one day

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I said the same thing mate after growing up around V8s and V12s, so this time aroundit had to be done. No regrets so far. I'm loving every minute of it.

[ QUOTE ]

Was just reading Evo at dinnertime, and their review of their Monaro VXR. And guess what? They've just fitted a sports exhaust!

[/ QUOTE ]

What did they have fitted, did they say? So far the only upgrades available are via Milltek and Wortec, the latter of the two sounds better, the Milltek isnt really much different to the stock system. Vaux also aupply the Holden upgrade at the same price of the Wortec, but there just isnt any comparison whatsoever.

Once again, thanx for all the good vibes and will definately bring this along to some meets over the coming weeks 169144-ok.gif

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Good point to make about the unmarked cars mind, I have spotted plenty of them over the last two days, and I was dead suprised to see some parked up in some unusual places.

On the A3, in the layby just after the turn off for Petersfield. On the Bordon Rd WTF???. On the road going through Wrecklesham.....they are everywhere. But all unmarked cars.

Hogs Back is definately the worst for it at the moment though, am glad that the road is so bloody hopless and doesnt really encourage you to drive over the limit anyways. There is also a regular CameraVan that is parked up on a blindspot as you are driving along from Bordon back towards Farnham, and just before the BP garage on the left, there is a van parked up on the grass verge. But it is sooo dark there, you would never see it until you saw the guy inside going "SAY CHEESE"

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well done mate. I never considered a monaro before, but on the way back from Rome on the cannonball I hitched a lift for a few hundred miles with Jim Brodie, who is one of the works GT racers for holden in the UK. His company car was bog standard (he gets a new one every 10K)and it scared the living poo out of me, especially when he took it up to 180+ on the hard should whilst racing a porsche!!!!!

needless to say the porsche driver was shocked to say the least!

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Jon, have needed to check my pants a few times today. Particularly with an EVO 8 that just appeared behind me out of nowhere. I flood it but he gave up. Am not contemplating trying to see what speed this car will top out at as yet, will leave that for a Bedford day, on that nice long straight!

There is a Ltd Ed Holden Monaro GT Racer up for grabs on Ebay, signed by Brodie 169144-ok.gif

oh....scale model I might add wink.gif

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you know what.... i was finding my way to the tyresmoke reviews section to have a look for what helfinger has had to say about strapping a supercharger to his R32 - since i have thinking about either chopping mine in or upgrading it for sometime now...

and i think your review has just tipped it for me...

hmmmm....just gotta wait for tomorrow now to book that test drive! in fact, im sure i got a business card from a helpful chap in the aldershot vauxhall stealers when i went and had a look at one there a while ago - is this where you picked your beasty up from too???

cheers,

calum.

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