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Gutted, feel like I am going to crack


AZURES3
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Apologies for the length and non car relevance of this post but have found it useful to get things out with other issues in this section.

I seem to have had a lifetime of stress thrown at me over the last 3 years. Wont bore you with the detail but includes Dad diagnosed with Cancer in 3 places in 2004 and had his Kidney removed, Mum with a huge tumour found late 2005 followed by an operation that went wrong and nearly killed her, she spent 5 months in ICU. Wife decided April 2006 she wanted to split and divorce has been finalised about 8 weeks now.

Mum is now about 95% ok and Dad has been on medication and having radiotherapy as tumours have appeared in a few places.

Last weekend he really didn’t seem himself and we were worried but as he is on a new cancer drug we thought it was a side effect, as it was one listed. He was very tired, a little confused and a bit dizzy. In the end on Tuesday morning I received a call from mum to say he was really not right and couldn't walk and was very confused. She called an ambulance and then we met at the hospital. A & E was ok but seemed little urgency and asked why he was in, we advised his cancer professor was concerned the new drugs may have caused him to have a stroke and advised us to call an ambulance. After a few hours of what seemed like little action in A & E I decided to politely advise them I was unhappy. I convinced them that their diagnosis was irrelevant as it was based on what they could see rather than what I know my dad is normally like. I cheeky C**t said he is walking fine, so I said show me as my dad them shuffled 5 paces, the doctor said see. I almost lost it but not so politely advised that this was not right as 3 days ago he had been out for a 1 mile walk with mum. They seemed a little shocked and 7 hours after arriving at A & E they did a brain scan. The confirmed 3 hours later that he had a brain tumour and that they believed it was luck they found it as they didn’t really need to do a brain scan as he had passed the neurological tests. In A & E. They said they thought the dizziness, confusion and lack of walking etc was an infection and that discovering a brain tumour was just luck from the scan. I was far from convinced and we eventually left my dad about 9pm in what I can only describe as a semi-vegetable. Has to be one of the hardest things to see from a man who what only seems like a few years ago was a CEO of a large company and is a very intelligent man.

We went home to receive a call to say that the scans had been reviewed at the Atkinson Morley Neurological centre in London , seems we had convinced them my dad really was not right. They had requested my dad was brought to them immediately via emergency ambulance. We were advised to get up to London, which I did in record time with my mum onboard and sister on route.

We were greeted by a team of surgeons who advised us that they were going to operate straight away as the pressure build up in the brain was so intense from trapped fluid that he would probably of not woken up in the morning if they didn’t operate immediately shocked.giffrown.gif They commended us for out persistence in A & E as without it the results would have been unthinkable.

I cant help thinking back to the people in A & E who made my mum feel bad for bringing him in and the consultants that told us that they hadn’t really needed to do the brain scan

I have been up to London everyday and trying to hold everyone together but it is so hard. 4 days later and my dad has drains coming out of his head to drain excess brain fluid as the tumour is blocking the bodies natural drains. He is still massively confused, doesn’t know where he is and cant remember things we tell him. He thinks its 1975 and I am 3 etc, absolutely heart destroying.

I am really struggling and went to the docs as I felt so stressed, he signed me off for 4 weeks after he heard the series of events and told me to look after myself and my family. A bit worried what work might think as I don’t take time of sick normally.

So I am left wondering, when will they start the radiotherapy to get rid of the cancerous tumour, and will and when will my dad be back to normal if ever He remembers who we all are but seems to be stuck in 1970's and is hallucinating etc, real life "life on mars" but not at all funny.

This is really hard to deal with and watch. frown.gif

If you read all of this, thanks for listening.

beerchug.gif

AZ

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Paul, thank god you told them at A & E that your dad could walk a lot furter than 5 paces.

Im sure most work personal depts can see what you have gone through and are going through and realize you need some time off and as you are not a person who takes time off without just cause.

ingers crossed for your dad andas hard as it seems keep your spirits up but don't hit the booze as your family may need your driving skills at anytime, weare all here for you mate as im sure you are aware

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First up, top man for sticking to your guns in A & E. They see so many "sick" people that they seem to be almost unconcerned at just one more.

Not much else I can think of to say except my stock line in this sort of situation. Everyone else will need you to be strong so that they have someone to support them and look after them. If you can't do anything to help your dad, then help everyone else as best you can.

Thoughts are with you, mate. 169144-ok.gif

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Best of luck mate. Unfortunately we end fighting so many battles just to see some peace in our lives yet sometimes life is never meant to be easy for some.

Always keep your chin up. You will need to help your dad get through it.

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Best of luck Az. Atkinson Morley is a superb hospital though and I know of several people who've been successfully treated there. They really are specialists in their field. 169144-ok.gif

Unfortunately my dad is also in hospital at present after suffering a heart attack last week and although he is responding well to treatment I do know somewhat of what you must be going though at the moment. frown.gif

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Very sorry to hear of your troubles, AZ. frown.gif

If it's any consolation, the delay in A&E between his admission and the scan is unlikely to have made any difference. Well done for persisting, though - the vast majority of staff in A&Es genuinely mean well but are constantly buried by work so are often a little deaf to pleas. You did the right thing and got the right result.

As Daz said, Atkinson Morley's is about the best there is, so I hope you can take some comfort in the fact that he is in the care of some of the leading experts in the world.

It must be pretty tough for you right now but I'm sure you'll hold it together for your parents. You've been through a lot recently and it can only make you stronger.

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Bloody hell Az, it must take a very strong man to go through what you have over the past couple of years.

Don't worry about your work, the fact that you don't take time off will show them just how serious things are for you at the moment and they will understand.

Keep your head up the best you can, you need to be there for the rest of your family, as I'm sure they will be there for you too.

I wish you and your family all the best, and hope that your Father makes a good recovery.

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Thanks guys, TSN smlove2.gif

Dont underestimate the comfort your comments add, TSN is so much more than a car forum and your kind words are much appreciated.

We have a long road ahead and today looks worse than yesterday but I will remain positive and my dad would want me to.

Thanks again.

AZ

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