Chav Posted February 18, 2005 Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 Ok peeps heres the rules... 1) bling your car outside n in to make it a total ninja mashine 1a) never use genuine porsche or brembo brakes. we're chavs rememba. so use a cheap tacky paint kit with stickers instead. 1b) get a tuning box for your deesal engin. 1c) dont buy genuine body kits. make em yerself. 1d) a kool way of getting a new grill is to use chrome strips or tin foil. gives it a youneek look. 1e) dont get factory fitted parkin sensors. they r way too dear man. we get em built into our reg plate holda's. 1f) get seat belt pads from ebay for a penny a set. thats right just a penny. 1g) put 3 layers of carpet mats on top of the factory-fitted ones. u no the score. 1h) get a "chrome-effect" plastic battery cover 1i) put on replica chrome mirrors. cheap plastic ones will work a treat. 1j) put some more of that tin foil round the headlights front n back 1k) put as many badges on your car as possible. you wanna look like a boy scout thats got everything. 1l) dont have a factory-fit satnav. their too classy. use a PDA or a tacky-tacky go. 1m) nip to lidl to get a cheese grater, split it in two, and put it on the front of ur car 1n) wire your fogs direct to the battery so theyre always on 1o) widen the spacing of the letters on ur reg plates 1p) let the air outta your tyres so ur car looks lower on da ground 1q) and finally put cheesy decals n stickers on your doors n windaz and of course entry is free, unlike the guild of posh blingsters Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UBM Posted February 18, 2005 Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 That is class - you know the bling better then me! I wish these fecking similies would come back to life. Looks like s first aid site with all those red crosses about... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantom Posted February 18, 2005 Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 Yeah I was just going to question that , I thought it was a web browser problem or something !, I noticed there is a One Series Icon now ?, haven't had a chance to see it yet .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UBM Posted February 18, 2005 Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 I have - it's not complimentary! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UBM Posted February 18, 2005 Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 Chavrio on point 1b) I no longer qualify... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ian_m Posted February 18, 2005 Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 its not meant to be!!! how can you compliment a 1 series?? it just doesnt happen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chav Posted February 18, 2005 Author Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 [ QUOTE ] Chavrio on point 1b) I no longer qualify... [/ QUOTE ] But seeing as though you pass all the other criteria with flying colours, your entry is safe for now DM. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UBM Posted February 18, 2005 Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 I know - but it's a full time job being uncomplimentary to it..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chav Posted February 18, 2005 Author Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 [ QUOTE ] how can you compliment a 1 series?? [/ QUOTE ] you could call it a car. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UBM Posted February 18, 2005 Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 [ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ] Chavrio on point 1b) I no longer qualify... [/ QUOTE ] But seeing as though you pass all the other criteria with flying colours, your entry is safe for now DM. [/ QUOTE ] phew! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ian_m Posted February 18, 2005 Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 [ QUOTE ] you could call it a car. [/ QUOTE ] but that would be a lie! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UBM Posted February 18, 2005 Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 [ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ] you could call it a car. [/ QUOTE ] but that would be a lie! [/ QUOTE ] Hehe [cue jump smilie] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantom Posted February 18, 2005 Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 I guess one way to get in would be to beat ChavJ at his favourite game ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UBM Posted February 18, 2005 Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 We did consider having a chavopoly party! Everyone, needless to say, to come dressed as chavs (Chavrio - that's civvies for you mate) and printing out a large board to play chavopoly on.... Couldn't find enough boeing corsas and novas to rent though.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chav Posted February 18, 2005 Author Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 [ QUOTE ] I guess one way to get in would be to beat ChavJ at his favourite game ! [/ QUOTE ] thats excellent Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantom Posted February 18, 2005 Report Share Posted February 18, 2005 Christ was that an upmarket Chav party ?, renting cars ....., must be easier ways to get novas / saxos these days ;o) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Please sign in to comment
You will be able to leave a comment after signing in
Sign In Now