Riz Posted September 29, 2005 Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 Abit of a touchy subject but Radio 1 are doing a STI awareness week and i hope it makes people realise its good to get checked up. After embarking on a new relationship i have decided to get checked up.... its the first time im going so dont know what to expect... abit scary as i havent been to the doctors for years..... Anyway what actually happens... how do they check me etc..... I keep hearing it alot that its better to be checked out eventhough your sexual history is sound. Any advice? Riz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mastermofo Posted September 29, 2005 Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 have heard they stick an umbrella down your jap's eye and open it and then withdraw eyewatering ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riz Posted September 29, 2005 Author Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 [ QUOTE ] have heard they stick an umbrella down your jap's eye and open it and then withdraw eyewatering ! [/ QUOTE ] oh dont say that..... seriously though..... Riz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruiser647 Posted September 29, 2005 Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 [ QUOTE ] have heard they stick an umbrella down your jap's eye and open it and then withdraw eyewatering ! [/ QUOTE ] You git. That is just cruel. However, in all honesty I do not know what they do, but that is not on the cards. That is used to take a sample IF you already have something really bad. OR if you come back from a tropical place with ticks/bugs in the uretha (as that is where some live and that is the only way to get them out) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chav Posted September 29, 2005 Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 [ QUOTE ] Anyway what actually happens... how do they check me etc..... [/ QUOTE ] Don't they make you sleep with the doctor's assistant? ...and if she's not dead within the week, then you're clear! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riz Posted September 29, 2005 Author Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 [ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ] Anyway what actually happens... how do they check me etc..... [/ QUOTE ] Don't they make you sleep with the doctor's assistant? ...and if she's not dead within the week, then you're clear! [/ QUOTE ] i knew this topic would be fun! Nothing wrong have a serious topic with some fun..... Mmmm im not worried just scared at what they might do to me..... have to work the day after etc.... Riz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Regulator Posted September 29, 2005 Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 http://www.icebergsandbabies.org.uk/sti's_testing_involved.htm ... Neo, try reading that mate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riz Posted September 29, 2005 Author Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 [ QUOTE ] http://www.icebergsandbabies.org.uk/sti's_testing_involved.htm ... Neo, try reading that mate. [/ QUOTE ]Cool Riz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mastermofo Posted September 29, 2005 Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 well i have heard the umbrella thing from a reliable source who used to be a regular at the clap clinic up until few months back as he was a regualr cheat on his g/frnd think its the test they use for clamydhia as they actually need a scrape sample of tissue think its best to go along tho and mature lots of people tend to ignore these things and 'hope' the situation away which is exactly why there is sucha an epidemic of STI/STD how hard is it to find info on where you local clinic is tho!?!? govt should def do somethingto increase the awareness Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew Posted September 29, 2005 Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 I know "someone" that has been tested. It is not nice but not painful ... let's say uncomfortable. Wooden thing, diameter of toothpick, down your jap eye for 4-5 secs then over. Make sure you p1ss on the side of the p1ss test-tube just to get your revenge. You will see what I (via someone) means. The worst thing is having a man touch your fella. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riz Posted September 29, 2005 Author Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 [ QUOTE ] well i have heard the umbrella thing from a reliable source who used to be a regular at the clap clinic up until few months back as he was a regualr cheat on his g/frnd think its the test they use for clamydhia as they actually need a scrape sample of tissue think its best to go along tho and mature lots of people tend to ignore these things and 'hope' the situation away which is exactly why there is sucha an epidemic of STI/STD how hard is it to find info on where you local clinic is tho!?!? govt should def do somethingto increase the awareness [/ QUOTE ]Yep i had to do a google search to find my local one..... Riz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riz Posted September 29, 2005 Author Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 [ QUOTE ] I know "someone" that has been tested. It is not nice but not painful ... let's say uncomfortable. Wooden thing, diameter of toothpick, down your jap eye for 4-5 secs then over. Make sure you p1ss on the side of the p1ss test-tube just to get your revenge. You will see what I (via someone) means. The worst thing is having a man touch your fella. [/ QUOTE ] ok now im scared! Maybe i`ll get the nurse to do it to me.... Riz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chav Posted September 29, 2005 Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 [ QUOTE ] I know "someone" that has been tested. It is not nice but not painful ... let's say uncomfortable. Wooden thing, diameter of toothpick, down your jap eye for 4-5 secs then over. [/ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ] The worst thing is having a man touch your fella. [/ QUOTE ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew Posted September 29, 2005 Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 The umbrella thing won't happen ... guaranteed. Just don't get a boner otherwise the doctor might try and get your phone number ... Oh, and there is a blood test too for HIV. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Regulator Posted September 29, 2005 Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 What ever she needs to get from your meat, tell her 2 suck it out!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riz Posted September 29, 2005 Author Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 keep it clean boys, in both sense of the word! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tomk Posted September 29, 2005 Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 "take swabs from inside the end of your penis" ouch thats going to hurt ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theduisbergkid Posted September 29, 2005 Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 Whilst they are checking for STIs, get them to check for WRXs too, you never know ..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riz Posted September 29, 2005 Author Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 [ QUOTE ] Whilst they are checking for STIs, get them to check for WRXs too, you never know ..... [/ QUOTE ] Riz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mo-S3 Posted September 29, 2005 Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 WRX's arent even worth worrying about. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Regulator Posted September 29, 2005 Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 [ QUOTE ] Whilst they are checking for STIs, get them to check for WRXs too, you never know ..... [/ QUOTE ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scooby_simon Posted September 29, 2005 Report Share Posted September 29, 2005 [ QUOTE ] WRX's arent even worth worrying about. [/ QUOTE ] Yup. You'll never catch one..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Omi Posted September 30, 2005 Report Share Posted September 30, 2005 You're interviewed briefly about your sexual activity and why you think you might be at risk, the doctor will then briefly examine your tackle ad take two swabs, one with a tiny plastic tip which isn't too bad and one with a cotton tip which feels a bit odd but not enough to make you cry. You're then sent to pee in a flask while they culture your swabs then a nurse will take blood. You can ask them to check for HIV while they're on but there's no point if you suspect you might have been exposed in the last 3 months as it may not show up. The doctor will then speak with you again, point out that you're clean and that you'll hear back about the bloods in about 9 days. It's not really a big deal, and definately worth getting checked out if you're a big man-whore like I used to be! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wallachie Posted September 30, 2005 Report Share Posted September 30, 2005 Omni is right, it's not as bad as people make out. People who tell the umbrella story have obviously never been to a GUM clinic! It's just a like a cotton bud being slipped down your fella, uncomfortable but not painful. Taking a blood sample is more uncomfortable. I went last year to get checked out, and the male Doctor asked if I minded if his trainee doctor could be present during the examination, I agreed and the trainee turned out to be a girl about my age and reasonably fit to boot! I was mortified, and my fella shrivelled up to an embarrasing size as if it was -10!! I will never have unprotected sex again! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chav Posted September 30, 2005 Report Share Posted September 30, 2005 [ QUOTE ] I went last year to get checked out, and the male Doctor asked if I minded if his trainee doctor could be present during the examination, I agreed and the trainee turned out to be a girl about my age and reasonably fit to boot! I was mortified, and my fella shrivelled up to an embarrasing size as if it was -10!! [/ QUOTE ] Do you drive a 206CC with the roof down a lot too then? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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