smurfette Posted January 31, 2006 Report Share Posted January 31, 2006 Baywatch star David Hasselhoff wanders into a Glasgow pub and the barman says: "What can I get you, Mr. Hasselhoff?" "A cold beer would be great," he replies, "but please, just call me Hoff." "Okay Hoff," says the barman, "nae hassel." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wallachie Posted January 31, 2006 Report Share Posted January 31, 2006 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AntW Posted February 1, 2006 Report Share Posted February 1, 2006 Hoff Hooked on a Feeling cheesiest video ever! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mook Posted February 1, 2006 Report Share Posted February 1, 2006 What a truly video. Not sure what worries me more - the fact that Hasselhof did it, or the fact that you found it Ant... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AntW Posted February 1, 2006 Report Share Posted February 1, 2006 haha... I was sent it via MSN and just had to share! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mook Posted February 1, 2006 Report Share Posted February 1, 2006 Yeah, right. Whatever... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaddyDub Posted February 1, 2006 Report Share Posted February 1, 2006 Dont bad mouth the Hoff, he is all seeing and will reep his vegence apon thee. FACT: Did you know when the Hoff does press ups, he is actually pushing the world down and not pushing himself up! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rustynuts Posted February 1, 2006 Report Share Posted February 1, 2006 [ QUOTE ] Hoff Hooked on a Feeling cheesiest video ever! [/ QUOTE ] You know, sometimes something happens and just brightens up your whole day. I've watched it twice so far and I can't stop laughing. But the strange thing is, it's not really a bad song. It's the sort of thing ABBA used to churn out way back when, and I can't get it out of my head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John_Doe Posted February 2, 2006 Report Share Posted February 2, 2006 27 FACTS ABOUT THE HOFF...... 1. David Hasselhoff is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis. 2. There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures David Hasselhoff allows to live. 3. When David Hasselhoff drinks pee, his asparagus smells funny. 4. When David Hasselhoff was born, the nurse said, "Holy Cow! That's David Hasselhoff!" Then she had sex with him. At that point, she was the third girl he had slept with. 5. When David Hasselhoff goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket. 6. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects David Hasselhoff could use to kill you, including the room itself. 7. The popular videogame "Doom" is based loosely around the time Satan borrowed two bucks from David Hasselhoff and forgot to pay him back. 8. David Hasselhoff can count backwards from infinity. 9. Crop circles are David's way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f**k down. 10. When David Hasselhoff jumps into a body of water, he doesn't get wet. The water gets David instead. 11. David Hasselhoff can divide by zero. 12. In fine print at on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by David Hasselhoff, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone has ever come to matching him. 13. David Hasselhoff is not lactose intolerant, he just refuses to put up with lactose's sh1t. 14. David Hasselhoff has two speeds: walk and kill. 15. David Hasselhoff is the reason why Wally is hiding. 16. David Hasselhoff can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night. 17. You are what you eat. That is why David Hasselhoff diet consists entirely of bricks, steel, and the tears of small children. 18. David Hasselhoff once beat Super Mario Bros 3 without even touching his Nintendo controller. He just yelled at his TV in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich, and the game beat itself out of fear. 19. David Hasselhoff played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won. 20. If you were to lock David Hasselhoff in a room with a guitar, a year later you would have the greatest album ever, it would sweep the Grammy's. When asked why he doesn't do this David replied "Because Grammy's are for queers." Then he ate a knife to show the seriousness of his response. 21. On his birthday, David Hasselhoff randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun. 22. When David Hasselhoff does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down. 23. Whenever David Hasselhoff puts out a cigarette, he throws it in slow motion into a long line of gasoline and calmly walks away as an inferno erupts behind him. 24. David Hasselhoff invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink. 25. David Hasselhoff coined the phrase, "I could eat a Horse" after he ate every last unicorn in existence. 26. David Hasselhoff haunts Freddy Krueger's nightmares. 27. The eternal connundrum "what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object" was finally solved when David Hasselhoff punched himself in the face. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaddyDub Posted February 2, 2006 Report Share Posted February 2, 2006 Dude, I posted these and the Mr T and the Chuck Norris ones about a week ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John_Doe Posted February 3, 2006 Report Share Posted February 3, 2006 [ QUOTE ] Dude, I posted these and the Mr T and the Chuck Norris ones about a week ago. [/ QUOTE ] Who's ya daddydub??? You're good...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peterleatherland Posted February 4, 2006 Report Share Posted February 4, 2006 Have a look at this site www.thecoolwall.co.uk its a rip off of top gear's cool wall, but it has a funny advert for the Hoff himself Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rustynuts Posted February 4, 2006 Report Share Posted February 4, 2006 Oh, that'll be your new website then, is it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peterleatherland Posted February 4, 2006 Report Share Posted February 4, 2006 it ain't mine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garcon magnifique Posted February 4, 2006 Report Share Posted February 4, 2006 Whoever he is he hasn't a feckin clue what he's talking about. [ QUOTE ] Mitsubishi VR4 ... Basically its a bigger version of the Mitsubishi EVO, using the same chassis and engine. [/ QUOTE ] Absolute bollocks. Cock. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fjfr Posted February 4, 2006 Report Share Posted February 4, 2006 [ QUOTE ] Absolute bollocks. Cock. [/ QUOTE ] Too True Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weedle Posted February 4, 2006 Report Share Posted February 4, 2006 Really dont know how the hell a delorean made the sub-zero ?? no taste or sense !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neimad Posted February 5, 2006 Report Share Posted February 5, 2006 [ QUOTE ] Really dont know how the hell a delorean made the sub-zero ?? no taste or sense !! [/ QUOTE ] Now there I really have to dissagree with you... C'mon, it's an icon. Alright, mostly because of Back to the Future, but nonetheless it's still a majorly cool car. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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