job hunting driving me to distraction - rant alert

[eolair]

sorry for the following, but this job hunting lark is driving me nuts...

Background: returned from sabbatical travelling round world + further six months looking after family. Prior successful career as management consultant in telecoms. Well respected by clients and peers, history of delivering the goods, and frequently saving everyone massive amounts of time and money, as well as pulling the bacon out of the fire more than once. Good 'hard' and 'soft' skills incl. being a published author and presenting at global conferences.

Have spent the last three months chasing jobs both within direct experience and wider field. Frustrated at Recruiting 'consultants' who lie, don't return calls, do not read the CV, do not read the job spec, go on two weeks' holiday without telling me or their client, claim I am too technical (really, so how come one of my last deals was a €50m procurement?) or have no financial knowledge (did you read the part how I developed business models for investments £50m to £500m?)

In a day and age when everyone and their aunt has a shiatty degree from no-name uni in media studies, can't spell or speak clearly, I've got a degree from on of the most respected faculties in one of the most respected universities. But it's a 2.2 from 15 years ago - the low grade explained by fact sister was undergoing cancer at time and family falling apart. But please ignore fact my thesis was so good it was published/presented at a conference. Please ignore my 15 years of experience. Please ignore my expert opinion reported in national media.

Again, sorry for rant and attitude, but I've had one too many recruitment ppl not return my call today. And no, i don't give 'attitude' on the phone or in person - I am nice as pie, honest.

Actually, seeing as it is Agony Aunt, if anyone is in HR / recruitment, I wouldn't mind another opinion on the CV. It's been reviewed already, and has passed, but help would be appreciated. TIA

[dukeboy749r]

They are feckers, and a scurge on the working populace.

Right up there with Solicitors who try and stiff you for money and con artists, imo

Have you tried applying directly? I am sure you have, but what about people you know?

[25thAnni]

I couldn't agree with you any more on that, Recruitment Agencies are awful. A piece of something that might be worth money to them if could give a toss to read your CV & listen to you properly. I hate the nicie nicie bullsh1t then they never get back to you. It's awesomely frustrating when you call them, email them, call again & you get sod all back. And if you do get something back its as you say "you didn't have the skills” what?? Can you give me something constructive to work on instead of that drizzle?? Surely if you read my CV beforehand?!?!

I've had to deal with a hell of a lot of them over the years and it’s a subject that to be frank boils my piss!

Sorry to rant also!!!

[bullett]

They are all totally useless and seem to latch onto single words rather than the context they are in. I'm also in Telecoms and rarely did I get a consultant (ha ha) put me in for a good role or anything relevant. I found a role through contacts in the end.

[eolair]

cheers everyone. was offered one role, but the culture was completely wrong, so turned it down. got to final interview on another, up til then they'd all said they'd deffo hire me, until their Head vetoed me.

It would have been nice to have secured something before xmas...

Can't understand why someone who has good history, proven delivery and presentable in public isn't getting more offers. Fingers crossed.

[patently]

Some experience from the other side.

We work in a small profession. When we want someone new, we ask a recruitment consultant. The simple reason is that we have previously placed adverts in the magazine that is circulated to everyone in the profession and which everyone reads, but we get no response. When we ask a consultant, they put an advert in which is largely identical to ours except that it elicits results.

Then they send us a "shortlist". So far as I can tell, this shortlist consists of everyone on their books. We sift through the shortlist, choose some for interview, choose one, and then tell the consultant what offer we are prepared to make.

So far as I can see, the consultant offers absolutely sod all value but manages to extract a 25% fee from us. The only advantage seems to be that candidates expect to go through a consultant so congregate (in a virtual sense) around them. If we want someone, we have to go through the gateway that is the consultant.

Completely mad.

[AvantSE]

I was once interviewed by a recruitment consultant, and I referred to his business as a recruitment agency. He went absolutely ape.

They are all lying money-grabbing parasites, whatever they call themselves.

[dukeboy749r]

Yep, should we ban them...?

[craigyb]

I've used agencies for the last 14 years and in general they are lying b4st4rds. Hows this for a scenario....

I working for an agent on a client site some miles from home, job is ok, but could do with being closer to home. My agent calls to tell me about a job closer to home and would I be interested, of course I say, so the agent says he will put my CV forward. Later I speak to a colleague at the other site and he tells me they have not seen my CV at all.

The agent has basically cleared me from the job by telling me he would represent me but never does, no other agent can now represent me due to the code of conduct regarding sole rep etc.

So now the agent keeps me at my current role and only puts forward guys who are not currently working for him in the hope he will get them employed and make more commission, the sneaky b4st4rds.

He did this a few times with a colleague of mine too until I told him what was happening, so from then on, everytime he called for other jobs we told him we were not interested and waited for other agencies to call regarding the same roles.

.....

Other agencies have recorded conversations without permission and tried to use them as legally binding contracts. When I complained to there bosses, they gave me a bollocking. So I reprted them to Oftel.

[cruiser647]

Know what you mean eolair!

I am currently looking for a job closer to home, and the amount of 'jobs and agencies' that get intouch offering contracts (I want perm) or offering £22K (I want a tad more than that mate) or come up with a completely different job to the one I sent in about!

Why bother!!!

[eolair]

They are (mostly) a right bunch. The thing is, as Bart says, you're damned if you do and damned if you don't.

My personal pet peeve is they don't return calls or 'finish up ' properly. I.e. you've sent in something, probably had a chat or two - they say "we'll put you forward" and then you hear nothing. All it takes is a 10 second call or email to say "sorry, didn't work out. You needed to have X experience". Basic manners really. I know that when I dealt with clients (in other line of work) I always made sure they knew where they were - no matter what the state of play.

[dukeboy749r]

Can't we have a New Years Rez banning them??? Or that they get an electric shot to the nads if they lie at all during any chat with you?

[pontyslapper]

I've had the hassle of dealing with these muppets for years as a recruitee when looking for a job.

In fact I am currently signed on with one of the biggest teaching ones - they've managed to get me just 2 days work since September.

During my 'training' week for the new job I answered the phone numerous times to the snivelling little poo who is my agency contact - he didn't realise it was me...

The fun will start on Jan 8th, I won't be using them at all - they pay shite rates to their supplies and charge more per day than anyone else.

They will finally realise that I'm on the other side of the fence and won't take anymore of their bollocks.

I've already advised a shedload of my 'supply' mates who were on their books to register with the other few, who have been a lot better at getting me placed.