Jump to content

An open letter to Lewis Hamilton


jb44
 Share

Recommended Posts

Dear Lewis

I saw you race yesterday, I saw you lay waste to both Ferraris (especially the Senna-esque manner of dispatching Raikonen - genius, sheer bloody genius) and I also saw you lose to Alonso. This is bad Lewis, very bad indeed. Allow me to explain. This Thursday Ecclestone and Mosley will finally get the chance to kick the poo out of Ron Dennis. Of the two it is Mosley your team principle has to fear most. Max Mosley, son of Oswald the blue-blood Nazi, believes himself superior to Ron Dennis (he reveals this by making snide comments about Ron Dennis' lack of formal education - the thought of someone actually achieving something through hard work and not having it handed to them on a silver platter obviously offends him)

As a rule , these frank and usefull airing of differences does not have much effect on the drivers, you being the the exception to that specific rule. They will hurt Ron; Ron loves you; they will hurt you. They will not harm Alonso; not only because Ron cares for him no more, but also because the FIA has a long history of absurd leniency towards spineless amoral euro trash.

Things are looking bleak Lewis, very bleak indeed. However, Bernie Ecclestone can at least be relied upon to whore you out according to the demands of TV ratings, and therein lies your opportunity. Make sure you keep the press sweet and be quicker than that contemptible little bag of squirming appetites in every single race Lewis, every single race. Your post-race interview was brilliant though, not so much for what you said, but for the effect it had on Alonso's facial expression! Absolutely priceless!! Then Kimi started talking, so I switched off the television - quickly.

Let me get back to Ron's love for you. In these cynical times, the love a seasoned warrior has for the genius protege is easily mistaken for Eros. As an avowed homosexual allow me to clarify, Ron is the one who discovered you and nurtured your career since you were 11 (I think)I first heard about you when you were just 13; Russell Bulgin (now with God, alas)mentioned you in his monthly column for Car Magazine. Round about the time you turned 17, articles proclaiming you to be the "Next Great One" began to appear. Fast forward to 2007 and you arrived in F1 like a Schumacher or a Senna; you immediatly made all of us who love the noble sport of F1 sit up and take notice. You race well, you speak well, you never give up and you Sir, are a gentleman. You are the glittering youth doing what us old men cannot anymore. (or never could, in my case.)This is why Ron loves you; this is why I love you; this is why Bernie and Max cannot.

Best of luck for Thursday, and should you be allowed to race, good luck for the Belgian Grand Prix. Do not despair, do not be swayed, do not surrender and remember, you can do what not a single FIA gimp can - you can race like a god. Be strong Gilded Youth, the Valley of Darkness awaits. (Alonso beat Schumacher, twice; never, ever forget this)

You are in my prayers(I'm queer though, don't expect miracles)

Kind Regards

Johan Buchner

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[ QUOTE ]

They will hurt Ron; Ron loves you; they will hurt you. They will not harm Alonso;

[/ QUOTE ]

That's rubbish. They will penalise both drivers or neither.

I'd say it's far more likely they'll penalise the team and let the driver's championship stand as-is. That way, they won't alienate all the new fans brought to the sport this year.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[ QUOTE ]

That's rubbish. They will penalise both drivers or neither.

I'd say it's far more likely they'll penalise the team and let the driver's championship stand as-is. That way, they won't alienate all the new fans brought to the sport this year.

[/ QUOTE ]

Methinks Sayerbloke is taking a SniffPetrol post too seriously m'Lud...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[ QUOTE ]

[ QUOTE ]

That's rubbish. They will penalise both drivers or neither.

I'd say it's far more likely they'll penalise the team and let the driver's championship stand as-is. That way, they won't alienate all the new fans brought to the sport this year.

[/ QUOTE ]

Methinks Sayerbloke is taking a SniffPetrol post too seriously m'Lud...

[/ QUOTE ]

The remark I made a reply to wasn't on SniffPetrol; it was just made by a SP reader who chose to post their thoughts here 169144-ok.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...