stewarta13wsb Posted August 16, 2006 Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 An ambitious yuppie finally decided to take a vacation. He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life ... until the boat sank! The man found himself swept up on the shore of an island with no other people, no supplies ... nothing. Only bananas and coconuts. After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to him. In disbelief, he asks her, "Where did you come from? How did you get here?" "I rowed from the other side of the island," she says. "I landed here when my cruise ship sank." "Amazing," he says. "You were really lucky to have a rowboat wash up with you." "Oh, this?" replies the woman. "I made the rowboat out of raw material that I found on the island; the oars were whittled from gum tree branches; I wove the bottom from palm branches; and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree." "But-but, that's impossible," stutters the man. "You had no tools or hardware. How did you manage?" "Oh, that was no problem," replies the woman. "On the south side of the island, there is a very unusual strata of alluvial rock exposed. I found that if I fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into forgeable ductile iron. I used that for tools and used the tools to make the hardware." The guy is stunned. "Let's row over to my place," she says. After a few minutes of rowing, she docks the boat at a small wharf. As the man looks onto shore, he nearly falls out of the boat. Before him is a stone walk leading to an exquisite bungalow painted in blue and white. While the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man can only stare ahead, dumb-struck. As they walk into the house, her beautiful breasts bouncing with each step, she says casually, "It's not much, but I call it home. Sit down please; would you like to have a drink?" "No thank you," he says, still dazed. "Can't take any more coconut juice." "It's not coconut juice," the woman replies. "I have a still. How about a Pina Colada?" Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepts and they sit down on her couch to talk. After they have exchanged their stories, the woman announces, "I'm going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you like to take a shower and shave? There is a razor upstairs in the cabinet in the bathroom." No longer questioning anything, the man goes into the bathroom. There, in the cabinet, is a razor made from a bone handle. Two shells honed to a hollow ground edge are fastened onto its end, inside of a swivel mechanism. "This woman is amazing," he muses. "What next?" When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but vines and a shell necklace-strategically positioned-and smelling faintly of gardenias. She beckons for him to sit down next to her. "Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, "we've been out here for a very long time. You've been lonely. I've been lonely. There's something I'm sure you really feel like doing right about now, something you've been longing for all these months? You know ..." She stares into his eyes. He can't believe what he's hearing. His heart begins to pound. He's truly in luck! "You mean ...", he gasps, "... I can actually check my e-mail from here?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris_B Posted August 16, 2006 Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 [ QUOTE ] "... I can actually check my e-mail from here?" [/ QUOTE ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
s4_sat Posted August 16, 2006 Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 [ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ] "...I can actually check my e-mail from here?" [/ QUOTE ] [/ QUOTE ] I think that I can actually check on Tyresmoke from here?" Would be more appropriate here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
craigyb Posted August 16, 2006 Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 Do we have any "Ambitious Yuppies" on Tyresmoke? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hopsta Posted August 16, 2006 Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 No, they are all off with 'Yuppie Flu' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeilB Posted August 16, 2006 Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 Ari's from the 80's so does he count? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garcon magnifique Posted August 16, 2006 Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 [ QUOTE ] Do we have any "Ambitious Yuppies" on Tyresmoke? [/ QUOTE ] I think nominations may be more likely than admissions ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ari Posted August 16, 2006 Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 [ QUOTE ] Ari's from the 80's so does he count? [/ QUOTE ] Yeah, I got here accidently after falling through a worm hole in the space/time continuum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SeanKHotay Posted August 16, 2006 Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 [ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ] Ari's from the 80's so does he count? [/ QUOTE ] Yeah, I got here accidently after falling through a worm hole in the space/time continuum. [/ QUOTE ] Whoa! You aren't Dr. Evil, are you? (I took the long way from the '80s) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ari Posted August 17, 2006 Report Share Posted August 17, 2006 Just get me some sharks with fricking laser beams on their heads!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeilB Posted August 17, 2006 Report Share Posted August 17, 2006 Well he posting about that house in the middle of the sea, that strangely looked like a Dr. Evil layer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
s4_sat Posted August 17, 2006 Report Share Posted August 17, 2006 I think this is required here Evil-O-Meter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
agazzard Posted August 17, 2006 Report Share Posted August 17, 2006 You Are 52% Evil You are evil, but you haven't yet mastered the dark side. Fear not though - you are on your way to world domination. How Evil Are You? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AJno1 Posted August 17, 2006 Report Share Posted August 17, 2006 Damn it! I though I was more evil than that. You Are 34% Evil A bit of evil lurks in your heart, but you hide it well. In some ways, you are the most dangerous kind of evil. How Evil Are You? http://www.blogthings.com/howevilareyouquiz/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SeanKHotay Posted August 17, 2006 Report Share Posted August 17, 2006 You Are 40% Evil A bit of evil lurks in your heart, but you hide it well. In some ways, you are the most dangerous kind of evil. How Evil Are You? http://www.blogthings.com/howevilareyouquiz/ Some select questions clarified: You've harmed yourself to get attention --> Took a nasty spin on roller blades to meet the cute girl I just passed...it worked! You've blamed a fart on someone else --> The Dog...but no one believed me You made someone's life hell in school --> The School Health Teacher...but not how you think. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malagus Posted August 17, 2006 Report Share Posted August 17, 2006 ***You Are 64% Evil*** You are very evil. And you're too evil to care. Those who love you probably also fear you. A lot. How Evil Are You? http://www.blogthings.com/howevilareyouquiz/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dazdot Posted August 17, 2006 Report Share Posted August 17, 2006 You Are 74% Evil You are very evil. And you're too evil to care. Those who love you probably also fear you. A lot. How Evil Are You? http://www.blogthings.com/howevilareyouquiz/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big_Al Posted August 17, 2006 Report Share Posted August 17, 2006 ***You Are 64% Evil*** You are very evil. And you're too evil to care. Those who love you probably also fear you. A lot. Oh deary me but very very nice the other 36% Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fingermouse Posted August 18, 2006 Report Share Posted August 18, 2006 You Are 78% Evil You are very evil. And you're too evil to care. Those who love you probably also fear you. A lot. How Evil Are You? http://www.blogthings.com/howevilareyouquiz/ 78% evil ...... cool Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garcon magnifique Posted August 18, 2006 Report Share Posted August 18, 2006 I tried it and got Behave. You're trying far too hard. Try it again, truthfully. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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