craigyb Posted August 18, 2006 Report Share Posted August 18, 2006 One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit." We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it." Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?" I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?" Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that b*tch knows I'm smarter than her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AJno1 Posted August 18, 2006 Report Share Posted August 18, 2006 That's priceless. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TDiAvant Posted August 18, 2006 Report Share Posted August 18, 2006 Classic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rs32 Posted August 18, 2006 Report Share Posted August 18, 2006 quality Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davidhodgkinson Posted August 18, 2006 Report Share Posted August 18, 2006 just dont let her read this then craig Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AntW Posted August 18, 2006 Report Share Posted August 18, 2006 lol... shes not read this then Craig? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarmac_Terrorist Posted August 18, 2006 Report Share Posted August 18, 2006 Perfect! ... read it out to 'The Mrs'. She related to it well Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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