NewNiceMrMe Posted August 6, 2010 Author Report Share Posted August 6, 2010 And MrMe although your daughter is going to uni locally is there any reason why she couldn't go and live on campus? It'll not happen. It is literally 20 minutes away. She's not stupid and knows what side her bread is buttered (both you'd think) and I'm not going to force her out when it's so close. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Posted August 6, 2010 Report Share Posted August 6, 2010 It'll not happen. It is literally 20 minutes away. She's not stupid and knows what side her bread is buttered (both you'd think) and I'm not going to force her out when it's so close. She'll probably meet some drug crazed hippy within a couple of days and move in with him Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruiser647 Posted August 6, 2010 Report Share Posted August 6, 2010 She'll probably meet some drug crazed hippy within a couple of days and move in with him That'll put his mind at rest! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewNiceMrMe Posted August 7, 2010 Author Report Share Posted August 7, 2010 She'll probably meet some drug crazed hippy within a couple of days and move in with him On the one hand i hope not, on the other, I live In hope. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calm Chris Posted August 23, 2010 Report Share Posted August 23, 2010 Well he is off to Uni (Northampton) in a few weeks to read English. When the girls went off to Corfu, he was at home with me and the attitude stopped dead, we went for a few beers and almost overnight he has changed from being a immature to55er in to a young man who is just a little bit scared of his future. Humility best describes it. So we went to Ikea and bought all his kitchen stuff, then next for single sized bedding and at some point a ration chest of basic foods. Nothing fancy, pasta, condiments, tins of soup, and a few 100 (not really) pot noodles. I suggested he contact the student union for door / bar work and due to his karate skills and they have offered him a few tester shifts. So he might even have some p/t work ! We have money for him (inheritance and endowments taken out at his birth) and have agreed that he will not get any until the end of it all, but have also decided that the money we 'save' due to him not being at home will be passed on as a monthly standing order. Would any of you that are youngers care to comment on the support / finances that your parents gave you while at Uni. It would be nice to hear what others did or didn't get Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewNiceMrMe Posted August 23, 2010 Author Report Share Posted August 23, 2010 I'll update another time. I'm pleased your news is very positive though. Mine hasn't changed a great deal in all honesty. Well, not for the better anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew Posted August 23, 2010 Report Share Posted August 23, 2010 Chri5 - in terms of Uni funding I didn't get a local authority grant so my dad paid my rent (£200 a month) and that was it. Spending money, car financing etc was all from me having three p/t jobs and student loan. In those days though you only got £1600 a year in student loans and also no fee from the uni to pay either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saab Posted August 25, 2010 Report Share Posted August 25, 2010 Looking back I was exceptionally lucky - and to be honest reading this thread has highlighted that. When I started uni in 1997 tuition fees were covered automatically. I qualified for a full grant, which at the time was about £1800 a year which covered my rent. I got an allowance of about £75 a week from my dad which meant I didn't need to work (except during the vacations) - very few students at my university did have a job. I took out the maximum in student loans which was £3600. I was also lucky enough to be given a car in my third year (a very old VW with 198,000 on the clock - but decent enough) with the tax and insurance paid - which I rarely used living in central Liverpool, but was extremely useful for the 250 mile journies home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calm Chris Posted August 26, 2010 Report Share Posted August 26, 2010 but was extremely useful for the 250 mile journies home. And saved carrying 11 weeks of smelly socks and jocks on the train On the finance side I still feel that we have previously made life too comfortable for him and that he needs to work out budgeting and finance for himself. Unknown to him, what with the life savings, the money set aside from all grand parents being dead and an endowment due in next year- he is 'worth' about £20k. He won't be getting any of it until Uni is concluded. Experience from other parents has shown that over funding them at Uni just means they have hangovers 7 mornings a week His 1st year hall accom will be £70 x 40 weeks via student funding. His 1st year fees of £9k odd is via student loan He should qualify for maintenance grants * (non repayable) and bursaries to cover food and living of about £100 per week. He will get £150 a month from us while at Uni, summers at home = none. It will be his choice to decide if he spends it all on socials or uses it to keep his loan levels low. * = cunning plan via creative accountancy, nearly all house income last year is via dividends so on paper we are a poor household. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sponge Posted August 28, 2010 Report Share Posted August 28, 2010 * = cunning plan via creative accountancy, nearly all house income last year is via dividends so on paper we are a poor household. Nice one! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calm Chris Posted August 28, 2010 Report Share Posted August 28, 2010 Nice one! Well sort of, it's a bit like being well enough off to buy your own house- but letting via social housing. A moral dilemma- so we agreed that if the system is 'broke' and everyone else takes advantage, why shouldn't we ! The calcs came through from student finance yesterday, and our cunning plan slipped up a bit. They use the HMIT figures, but don't include losses for self employed (so selling the car to wifey was a waste of time). Net result is £3200 x 3 years for fee's on student loan. Then there's the loan and grant for accom and food / beer etc which amounts to £7500 odd (about £3600 is loan, the rest is grant). In head calcs were that he ends up with £110 pw for 42 weeks for play. That will be added to by us and he gets the choice of spending to the limit and large student borrowings or living carefully and minimising debt. I wonder what he'll do Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
m4ttm4son Posted August 28, 2010 Report Share Posted August 28, 2010 Unknown to him, what with the life savings, the money set aside from all grand parents being dead and an endowment due in next year- he is 'worth' about £20k. Is it possible to make it plainly clear to him that this is available only as a deposit on his first property purchase? I've had something similar from a grandparent I've been waiting 10 years (18th birthday) for. I'm currently trying to spend it wisely Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sponge Posted August 29, 2010 Report Share Posted August 29, 2010 Well sort of, it's a bit like being well enough off to buy your own house- but letting via social housing. A moral dilemma- so we agreed that if the system is 'broke' and everyone else takes advantage, why shouldn't we !The calcs came through from student finance yesterday, and our cunning plan slipped up a bit. They use the HMIT figures, but don't include losses for self employed (so selling the car to wifey was a waste of time). Net result is £3200 x 3 years for fee's on student loan. Then there's the loan and grant for accom and food / beer etc which amounts to £7500 odd (about £3600 is loan, the rest is grant). In head calcs were that he ends up with £110 pw for 42 weeks for play. That will be added to by us and he gets the choice of spending to the limit and large student borrowings or living carefully and minimising debt. I wonder what he'll do Precisely. That's one reason why I never understood the public outcry over MP's expenses. Work the system for all it's worth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewNiceMrMe Posted September 17, 2010 Author Report Share Posted September 17, 2010 I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxyboy Posted September 17, 2010 Report Share Posted September 17, 2010 I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. I shall not commit murder. You sure? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saab Posted September 17, 2010 Report Share Posted September 17, 2010 Try to keep calm and remember that it is genuinely just a phase - teenagers don't think in the same way as adults. Most people grow up pretty quickly after starting uni. If you genuinely cannot control yourself I'm sure an alibi can be arranged. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calm Chris Posted September 18, 2010 Report Share Posted September 18, 2010 Cameron's gone, wife bawled her eyes out. It was emotional, but it's onward and upwards for him now. Actually had some sensible chats the last few weeks, what with going away parties, meals out, shopping, cooking lessons etc we re-learn't a bit about each other. He knows I'm not 100% tw4t and I now know the same about him. As for Miss Me snr why not see if there's any space in the halls of residence and tell her to go! If she feels hurt at the suggestion then you have to explain why you feel she should. If may only be a local Uni, but why shouldn't she get in with the culture and ethos of the Uni a bit more ? Anyway tell her what you expect, accept that unless wife + you show a solid stance, she won't be 'bothered'. One of the things I found is that a Mum has more naturing instinct, and they will agree with you- but will then soften when it's discussed as the group. No pocket money becomes £10 'borrowed' of Mum and never paid back !! If things need taking away, or need to be earned then the message must be the same from both of you. It was diluted at ours on occasion due to motherly love. Mind you- I was the same with my Mum, weren't we all. Mum = soft, Dad = evil. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malagus Posted September 18, 2010 Report Share Posted September 18, 2010 (edited) Might I suggest a Summer Internship/placement year if possible for those about to go off to uni. I have always been pretty self motivated, had a job at uni, made money on the side through various things. However, having just completed placement year, I have a much better idea of what I want to do on the whole. I am now better at budgeting, time management, and through saving like hell and working 80 weeks at times, paid for my own new car, my own holiday, and a couple of little trips out to Germany and to gigs. Being chucked in at the deep end into the REAL world of work, not 10 hour a week uni beer money jobs, has helped me no end. Just a question of whether they are motivated enough to find a good placement and get it. ETA: MrMe, if you are mad at your daughter right now, I suggest taking her car from her, and swapping it for something worse, so she realises what privileges shes been taking for granted. Got a lovely Citroen C2 here you can use, will swap V5s Edited September 18, 2010 by malagus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewNiceMrMe Posted September 18, 2010 Author Report Share Posted September 18, 2010 MiniMe Snr has taken a year out and is going to work for MrsMe. It'll be utter hell and it'll be interesting when the first person to fire her is her own mother - because it'll happen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malagus Posted September 18, 2010 Report Share Posted September 18, 2010 Take the opportunity to convince her to re-apply to unis. different unis. Bournemouth is lovely. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewNiceMrMe Posted September 18, 2010 Author Report Share Posted September 18, 2010 She doesn't need to re-apply. She has a place at Edinburgh which they have deferred for a year. She'll simply take it next year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malagus Posted September 18, 2010 Report Share Posted September 18, 2010 Ah that's not too bad. I was under the impression she was living at home for uni from previous posts. Anyways, good luck with her! Out of curiosity, whats she going to study, if you don't mind me asking? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewNiceMrMe Posted September 18, 2010 Author Report Share Posted September 18, 2010 Marketing. (and it was going to be local but she didn't get in at Northumbria, her own fault) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malagus Posted September 18, 2010 Report Share Posted September 18, 2010 Best of luck to her. - Shame she didn't get into northumbria, they've got a great business school. Edinburgh is good too, though I must admit I didn't know they did pure marketing! I'm out of touch already!. In 8 months I may well have a load of old marketing textbooks etc for her if she wants them. I love my marketing modules, and there's plenty to cover. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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