Riz Posted March 29, 2005 Report Share Posted March 29, 2005 Its happened again, my heart has been broken and i feel my life is over... all i have had mostly for the past 10 years is hurt and pain. My ex dumped me without reason by text and now the lady who i want to spend my life with doesnt love me Im in so much pain right now, what have i been doing wrong? Im so lost and my work mates said i should take time off work..... i said i cant because when i am alone i cry and the hurt gets worse, almost cried today working. I have my own place now but it doesnt mean anything to me....... I dont post much but thought i would share this with you, i need advice... what can or do i do? She told me she needs time and space to think about things...... Im hurting so badly..... ive been advised to go and see i doctor but i cant.... they cant help me, or can they? help. Riz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
loddrik Posted March 29, 2005 Report Share Posted March 29, 2005 Hell, I was going to post something typically vitriolic, but on reading your thread, you have my sympathies mate. The4 only philosophy I could impart, is that the best way to get your own back is to move on with your life and find some sort of happiness, easy to type though! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
loddrik Posted March 29, 2005 Report Share Posted March 29, 2005 If I were you, I'd get some time off work, go and travel and see the world, you'll have a great time doing it, and there's no better way to take stock of your life and where you are going. Just remember to take in Thailand and Ibiza Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ian_m Posted March 29, 2005 Report Share Posted March 29, 2005 Riz, sorry to hear that mate, its a difficult one and everyone has different ways of dealing with this situation, I usually find that talking to people will help, it wont solve the problem and only you and the lady in question will know what happens next!! Maybe if you think a doctor could help with depression issues you could easily talk to your doctor I know it doesnt seem like it now but it will get better! hang in there buddy, if you need to talk PM if need be Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mo-S3 Posted March 29, 2005 Report Share Posted March 29, 2005 Sorry to hear that yaar, i know its not easy at all when your going through a tough time in your personal life. Its very upsetting and although at that moment in time you think your life is at its worse it does get better. Trust me, im going through a hell of a lot of problems in my own personal life and by talking to people it help get that pain out from inside of you. Time does and will heal, but dont try to keep yourself to yourself it will only depress you even more. Take a couple of weeks off and go aborad and forget her for a while. Clear your head deal with any crap when you get back. Some women thrive off doing your head in, so dont fall into their web. Good luck and remember we are all here for you. Pm me if you want to talk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bazza_g Posted March 29, 2005 Report Share Posted March 29, 2005 mate, sorry to hear this has happened - after our chats I know how positive you were about this girl and the new place. If things do start to get too much on top of you and talking with family/mates doesn't work don't be afraid to go and see the doc - he will be able to put you in touch with someone impartial/easier to talk to All I can say is that whilst it hurts now, it will get better in time. Try to keep your spirits up and drop me a PM or MSN if you need a chat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Markallain Posted March 29, 2005 Report Share Posted March 29, 2005 Sorry to hear of your troubles Riz. Spending time with some friends has helped me in the past. Hope this might work for you too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JamesB Posted March 29, 2005 Report Share Posted March 29, 2005 Very sorry to hear this, Riz. I'm with the others here - get it off your chest, have a right whinge to as many people as you fancy (the PM offer stands from me as well), slag off the whole world, but stay busy. Sitting around mulling over things on your own isn't going to achieve much - you will only have one person's thoughts and they're not likely to be 100% positive, if you know what I mean. So get out a bit, travel if that's your thing, maybe even a TSN meet (who cares if it's the other side of the country). Also consider exercise - it's a great outlet for frustration and low mood and, if you're finding it difficult to sleep, there's nothing like being physically tired to help out. Good luck, buddy - you now have an excuse to become a total post whore as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scotty Posted March 29, 2005 Report Share Posted March 29, 2005 Their loss mate. Keep your chin up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ritey Posted March 30, 2005 Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 Just remember fella, your not the only sole out there broken hearted at the moment, try not to be the the last person still broken hearted. Sounds harsh but if you can see the positive side, you just need to get up take stock and start doing things to get back on top. Small steps again and you'll crack it. Time is definatly a healer though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pagan Posted March 30, 2005 Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 Not sure that this will help, but advice you'd be good to remember. "Time is a great healer" - bollocks. Time will only take ages to pass as the memory of your upset slowly fades. And unfortunately, it will be slow. All you can do is carry on, follow the above suggestions if you want, they are good ideas, but no one can take that memory from you, and you will not be able to remove it yourself. If nothing can be done, do not dwell on the situation, you'll only recede within your own mind, which is a bad thing to do. Do not force memories out or in, for exactly the same will happen. If you know you can't change it, why worry. Move on. And chin up. Pag. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drew666 Posted March 30, 2005 Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 Having been through 2 wives and countless girlfriends in the last 15 years, I am perhaps not the best person to be offerring advice on matters of the heart, but I'll give it a go: "To suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune or to take arms against a sea of foes and by opposing, end them" Shakespeare was right when he put Hamlet's destiny in his own hands. You, and only you Neo are responsible for your wellbeing. Travel the world. Take every day as it comes. Enjoy every sunrise. Be thankful for every sunset. Worship at life's altar. Life is far too short for sadness and regrets. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mo-S3 Posted March 30, 2005 Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 Riz, seeing as your a shy person, just get into a few chat rooms on the net and chat to some women or blikes its up to you, at least this way you wont be moping about thinking about the woman who has problems making her mind up. Oh and dont worry most women cant make their minds up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riz Posted March 30, 2005 Author Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 I refuse to give up on her.... im going to wait. Its not easy at all.... I will be back people.... in a month or two. Thank you & take care. Riz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delibird Posted March 30, 2005 Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 so sorry to hear what happened to you, and can I just say that dumping somone by text is just so so wrong. Of course you are going to hurt, you are in love with this woman. But if she can't even give you the dignity of finishing it face to face, then I'm not sure that she deserves you. It sometimes seems that the whole world is plotting against us and that there is no place to turn, but by what I have seen you have people who care about you here and who are there for you when things go wrong. I would take some time out and go abroad. It's not running away, but it will give you a chance to focus your thoughts, and hey any reason to travel is a good reason. Finally, keep your chin up and listen to your friends, they have what is best for you in their hearts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruiser647 Posted March 31, 2005 Report Share Posted March 31, 2005 Bad news Neo. This is life. Loads of things are sent to try us. Your house purchase certainly tried your patience, but you got through it. Therefore, you can get through this. Waiting for some-one is all well and good IF you have a good chance of it working. However, as I found out, (this happened sort of twice to me), the first time it was OK and the g/f and me got back together. Then 6 mnths on and it is now over. We are still friends, BUT I know nothing will happen now. Move on with YOUR life - only you can dictate where it goes. Put yourself first from now on. NOBODY else will put you first. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tomk Posted March 31, 2005 Report Share Posted March 31, 2005 happened to me again to , and to be honest why else do people think im on this thing at 3am in the morning ? i went out and blew a lot of cash on my car, always helps me feel better, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johneroberts Posted March 31, 2005 Report Share Posted March 31, 2005 just go out and pay for a good old shag riz, and find a little thai lady that will look after you. and remember theres always pam. jr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fatcat Posted March 31, 2005 Report Share Posted March 31, 2005 Listion to jr me 'ol mucker - he has the right idea. www.shagsRus.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luke Posted March 31, 2005 Report Share Posted March 31, 2005 Hi Riz, long time no speak. Sorry to hear your news, thats one honest post if ever I heard one. To put things into perspective I think nearly every guy on here could tell you about a failed romance. My old g/f said she wanted a break and 2 months later she was married! At the time it hurts like hell but now I think what a lucky escape I had. I now live with lady who is really beautiful, fun and enjoys life. We met on a blind date (I think she must have been the blind one!) and 10 years later we still are 100%. You see, you do get lucky. All I can say is get your mates to rally around you and get you out as much as possible. Dont stay at home on your own, you'll end up really pissed off and negative. Join a gym, not for the boring bit but to look at loads of girls with tight pants on, that will give you a lift. Honest mate life is way too short, however hard it is you've got to move on. And never go back its never the same. If you need to pm me feel free, Luke. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewNiceMrMe Posted April 1, 2005 Report Share Posted April 1, 2005 Riz, sorry, I have only just spotted this thread. Terribly sorry to hear of this and I can imagine the heartache you're going through at the moment. Much of the advice I'd give has already been offered above so it's pointless referring to it again. However, the one thing I would say is that beyond the emotion and the heartache you're feeling for her at the moment you really should take a step back and examine the way in which she broke it off - i.e. by text. That's not nice Riz, it just isn't. From what I've seen of you on here you come across as a decent and probably a caring bloke so you deserve better than that mate. Don't let her walk over you my friend, just don't let it happen. For anything to work it's got to be mutual respect and understanding, no matter how much you feel for her. I hope it works out for you in the long term mate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soulboy Posted April 3, 2005 Report Share Posted April 3, 2005 Sorry to hear about the news Riz. You have been away while I have gone through similar experiences which were posted on here. I thought my world had ended. But you DO get over things little by little, one day at a time, and suddenly you have moved on a long way and arent thinking about her as often (all the time!!!!). You will also realise that she is not unique and the only fantastic girl in the world.........most of them are fantastic in different ways. I think loosing true love is like coming off heroin - and I really dont want to go through it again myself, so I sympathise. Its as if all the excitement, pleasure and enjoyment you have at the start (when you are flying) has to be repaid at the end with saddness and upset. I hate it. hang in there Ace - each day will be a little bit easier than the last. ...and Riz. I bet there isnt one person on this forum who hasnt gone through it at sometime in their life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riz Posted April 3, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 3, 2005 Thank you... I find talking about my problems etc to people or even on the online community helps alot. I have hope that she wont take too long thinking things over..... Riz p.s. still another month atleast before ive got broadband/phone line in my apartment will be back online more then.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rustynuts Posted April 3, 2005 Report Share Posted April 3, 2005 Riz, did the R32 not sell? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riz Posted April 3, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 3, 2005 [ QUOTE ] Riz, did the R32 not sell? [/ QUOTE ]Mmmm ive had alot of timewasters to be honest... i think its in the Autotrader magazine from tomorrow so will have to see what develops. Had alot of intrest too. Riz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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