Busby Posted March 1, 2013 Report Share Posted March 1, 2013 Sad to read this. Thoughts are with you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tipex Posted March 1, 2013 Report Share Posted March 1, 2013 kind of want to get the children up to see her, but know they'll be shocked when they clap eyes on her & that she'll be exhausted (she spent half an hour napping against my shoulder this afternoon). I'm inclined to try and arrange a brief visit though. Perhaps Mrs P could nip out to town with one kid at a time, just leave one plus me plus Sis. :confused: This is a tricky one, I got taken to see my nan when she was in her last few days before cancer took her, and while i'm glad I did, I kinda wish I hadn't, as I don't like remembering her like that. It did however teach me a lesson, that life is fragile, and it can be gone in a blink of an eye, and to make the most of every moment, and spend as much time as possible with your loved ones while you can. That side of our family are always bickering and falling out (my mother had 8 brothers and sisters, some of whom are sadly no longer with us) and I promised myself that no matter what, I was never going to let that happen with my brothers and sisters (I'm one of five), as the disappointment on her face as she lay in bed, knowing that some of her children wouldn't visit her in her dying days because one if the others was there was plain to see. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shark_90 Posted March 2, 2013 Report Share Posted March 2, 2013 Totally rubbish. Really sorry to hear it and best wishes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eldavo69 Posted March 3, 2013 Report Share Posted March 3, 2013 Only just seen this - awful news and hope that you manage to enjoy some happy memories with your mum too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patently Posted March 3, 2013 Author Report Share Posted March 3, 2013 Again, thanks for all your thoughts. Took everyone up to visit her yesterday, it went really well. She has been improving daily since she got out of hospital, just being at home makes her feel better. So there wasn't the visual shock I was worried about for the children, and they chatted nicely. She enjoyed seeing them, too. Wasn't able to get there today as I've been catching up on stuff here, but my sister was there and we chatted on the phone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soulboy Posted March 4, 2013 Report Share Posted March 4, 2013 (edited) I am sorry to hear that news Patently. My girlfriend nana died last week, after being taken ill suddenly and succumbing to an infection after the operation. But because it was on the cards after the operation, everyone got to see her and say their goodbyes. In some ways this is better than getting the surprise news that someone has passed away peacefully in their sleep. You would always think you never got a chance to say goodbye etc.then. So, you may get some comfort that over the coming weeks and months everyone will be able to say and do the right things. Its also in the right order. Parent dying before child. One of the hardest things i have ever done is take a member from here (Sharkwright) to hospital to identify his 17 y o.daughter who had been killed in crash. That was a truly shocking time. I don't think he ever got over it and has completely disappeared. Edited March 4, 2013 by Soulboy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drinks Posted March 4, 2013 Report Share Posted March 4, 2013 Very sorry to hear your news, and echo everyone's feelings. Mrs. Drinks' mum passed away at home under similar circumstances just under a year ago. The macmillan nurses are amazing both from practical and emotional perspective. Sounds like you and your sister are there for each other too, our thoughts are with you and your family at this difficult time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theduisbergkid Posted March 4, 2013 Report Share Posted March 4, 2013 This is a sensitive subject, we're all thinking of Patently and his family at this difficult time of course, and I hope that they're having a good day today, however.... I'm one of five Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mook Posted March 4, 2013 Report Share Posted March 4, 2013 Just caught up on this and really sorry to hear it. I have no memories at all of my mum, so remember every moment you can Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twinspark Posted March 4, 2013 Report Share Posted March 4, 2013 In some ways this is better than getting the surprise news that someone has passed away peacefully in their sleep. You would always think you never got a chance to say goodbye etc. This is a very good point. My dad passed away around 7 years ago - I knew he was getting older and struggling a bit but he was tough as old boots. I'd called him mid-week from Bremen, just after starting a new job, telling him how fantastic it was - and promising to show photos when I returned. That weekend, I was in Manchester visiting him in critical care - but I still thought he'd be OK - and I left to fly out to the Channel Islands on the Sunday evening - promising to be there when he was let out, in my new company car. (This was a big deal for us both at the time - my first company car! - he felt I'd made something of myself...) He died the night I landed in Jersey. So I never really got to say goodbye, he never saw the photos of Bremen and he never got to ride in my 'flashy new car'. (His words). Make the most of the time you have left - and remember that the rest of the family will need someone strong to look up to and rely on during this time. The worst part of my dad passing away was my mother trying to kill herself a few months later. I hadn't realised how hard it had hit her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bells0 Posted March 4, 2013 Report Share Posted March 4, 2013 So sorry to read this, thoughts are with you and your family. I lost my Father to cancer in 2010 after a short 10 month battle after diagnosis. I didn't want to accept it, and thought he was getting better. My family hid the fact that it was terminal as i was trying to keep the family business going. Not a lot i can add really, just know what you are going through and how heartbreaking it is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patently Posted March 5, 2013 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2013 Downturn today. Family is gathered around Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M8CKN Posted March 5, 2013 Report Share Posted March 5, 2013 Thoughts are with you all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tipex Posted March 5, 2013 Report Share Posted March 5, 2013 Fingers crossed it's just going to be one of the ups and downs on the journey, and you get more time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Waylander Posted March 5, 2013 Report Share Posted March 5, 2013 Just seen this. Not much to say really other than thoughts and prayers are with you all Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chick Posted March 6, 2013 Report Share Posted March 6, 2013 We are all thinking of you and your family Patently x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Biscuits Posted March 6, 2013 Report Share Posted March 6, 2013 So sorry to hear this Mr P, like A_C just mentioned, we're all thinking of you and the family. Spend every minute you can with her.... and remember she's going to a better place Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mo-S3 Posted March 10, 2013 Report Share Posted March 10, 2013 Sorry to hear about this, at least you have been told and have time to mentally prepare your self to some degree. i know its not reassuring but hang in there and feel free to verbally attack anyone here if you need to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calm Chris Posted March 10, 2013 Report Share Posted March 10, 2013 Hope she's having a kick ar5e Mother's Day :heart: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patently Posted March 10, 2013 Author Report Share Posted March 10, 2013 Thanks, again, everyone. Hope she's having a kick ar5e Mother's Day :heart: Sorry Chri5, she so didn't. We finally lost her at about lunchtime. I've just put this on the blog: RIP MumAs the phrase goes, her long battle with cancer ended today, Mothers' Day, leaving her now in peace. But there was so much more to her life than the way it ended. A dedicated primary school teacher of the (literally) old school who believed in imparting knowledge to children and ensuring that they could all read, write and add up, she also embraced what were then new methods to ensure that this process was done gently and kindly - with the child running alongside rather than dragged behind. At home, she brought up three children who knew that help with schoolwork would always be available, and that the suffix "It's for school" would guarantee a positive response to any "Can I..." question. To say we had an educational springboard is beyond understatement. And it worked, too; all three of us are graduates, and are now a patent attorney, a consultant radiologist, and a journalist. She was proud, and she made sure that we knew she was. Warm and affectionate, she made our home into the safe refuge from the outside world that it should be. As a family, we were always slightly different, slightly out of place, and the security of home that she created for us was a source of strength. She really did fight the cancer that eventually took her. She also kept her sense of humour to the end, teasing all three of us in different ways. We were blessed with over a week's warning of the end, and were able to use that, to gather, and to say goodbye. There were moments of wit that week that were uniquely her; I will not forget them. Bye Mum xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy_Bangle Posted March 10, 2013 Report Share Posted March 10, 2013 (edited) I'm very sorry your mother passed on however, she is no longer in pain/suffering. I hope peace and comfort will find you and your family during this difficult time, just remember that although she is gone she is still right with you in spirit. Edited March 10, 2013 by Andy_Bangle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daz Posted March 10, 2013 Report Share Posted March 10, 2013 So very sorry to hear this news RIP PatentlyMum Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calm Chris Posted March 10, 2013 Report Share Posted March 10, 2013 Feck that was quick, bless her- there is no more pain. She's in peace, and back with your Dad. Now you guys have to be strong for each other, cherish the memories and be thankful that you had such a wonderful mum. You have my sincere condolences. Sorry if my earlier post now seems crass, it wasn't meant to be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luke Posted March 10, 2013 Report Share Posted March 10, 2013 Very moving Patently. Puts other trivial things into perspective. I think it's very fitting that she passed away on Mother's Day. She sounds like a hell of a mum. Thoughts are with you. Luke Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patently Posted March 10, 2013 Author Report Share Posted March 10, 2013 Sorry if my earlier post now seems crass It didn't, at all. It said what I would have wanted to do, but it wasn't to be Thanks everyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Please sign in to comment
You will be able to leave a comment after signing in
Sign In Now